Here's Sydney guarding our case of Heineken, cleverly wrapped in gold foil paper as a "gift for the Captain" that I would need to deliver personally....or so the story would go if asked about it

NOTICE: THIS PAGE IS FOR AMUSEMENT ONLY AND NOT TO ENCOURAGE EXCESSIVE DRINKING, IRRESPONSIBLE BEHAVIOR, BREAKING ANY RULES, LAWS OR CUSTOMS AND NO MATTER WHAT YOU DO PLEASE DO NOT FALL OFF THE SHIP OR ENGAGE IN ANY BEHAVIOR THAT WOULD CAUSE YOU OR SOMEONE ELSE TO DO THAT BECAUSE IT IS A REALLY LONG WAY DOWN TO THE OCEAN AND MOST OF THE TIME A ONE WAY TRIP.

Obtaining Your Booze

This secret page is just for information about how to smuggle booze on board the ship. The first step is to actually GET the booze.

I suggest buying it when you arrive at your port city. In Miami, for example, there are several reasonable liquor stores in your path if you travel directly to the port from MIA. If you've blown in town early and are spending the night in one of the downtown hotels, I suggest Road Runner Liquor #2 at 51 SE 1st Street. It's about a 3 minute cab ride from, say, the Sheraton and offers a unique look at another side of Miami (not good part of town- tell the driver to keep the cab running and lock the doors). If that scares you and you're staying at the Hyatt or the Intercontinental for a nice tip one of the valet's at the front door can take your order and your cash and bring it to your room after they get off work. (This is not listed as one of the hotel's services)

To find liquor store information in your own port before leaving home go to

http://www.superpages.com/

For better information, once you get in town ask people that look like they could use a drink....they probably have inside info on this topic

If you plan on bringing it from home, put it in some giant ziploc bags and pack it in the middle of your largest suitcase for added protection.

Consuming your booze

To be discreet follow these suggestions:

On deck, use an insulated mug filled with your mixer- add your booze that you have cleverly concealed in a water bottle
If you have icky deck neighbors skip the insulated mug and drink directly from the refreshing water bottle filled with booze
Don't go to the bar with your concoction and ask the bartender to "give this a little spin" on their blender
There are nice, innocent looking picnic baskets available that will carry all you need for a complete bar set up
When the roving deck waiter comes by order a bucket of beer "Hold the beer" to have a nice supply of ice
If you've made your own "Drink of the Day" keep it to yourself and those directly around you. Other passengers lining up by your lounge chair for a sample is a dead giveaway that you're mixing your own booze or having your own a hairy chest contest, both of which are frowned upon.
Know the path back to your stateroom in the dark. If you can make it with your eyes closed you have a chance of making it when you are blitzed by the sun and your booze
To get a jumpstart on the day, stop by the gift shop to see if they're giving out free samples of booze for "tasting". Remember: You have a problem with making decisions so you'll probably have to try the samples again and again
After your jumpstart in the Gift Shop stop by the art auction for free champagne. It's not really necessary to pretend to be interested in the art work but don't make any sudden motions with your hands or you might end up with a really overpriced print that you could have found at Wal-Mart in the poster bin for much much less

Put It In Your Checked Luggage

Facts, Myths and Tips about booze or soda smuggling:

Smaller boxes of wine travel easier and than large ones- the weight is easier to distribute and conceal in your luggage
A cheap collapsable cooler, like from Sam's club, works great for keeping your drinks cold either on your balcony or in your shower (they are known to leak sometimes)
Rum, Vodka and Gin can be easily concealed in a branded water bottle (Evian, etc) , no need to conceal them- just be careful if Grandma Bessy wants a drink of your "water"- better yet, let the kids refresh themselves and kill time watching them stagger into one another while waiting to board the ship
A bucket of beer is your best beer purchased through the ship, a case of beer purchased in dang near any liquor store in the world will cost less.
Don't listen to people that say its "no problem" to bring booze on in your carry on. Those people work for the security army at the pier and they all have a big party with confiscated booze everyday as soon as the ships set sail. Put it in your checked luggage.
If its just the mind numbing effects you are concerned about, pick booze with a high "proof" like Bacardi 151 or Grain Alcohol, to mix with the free punch, lemonaide or tea available 24/7 on the lido deck. Less luggage space required.
Watch those kids, mine found out how to make their kiddie soda cards pack extra punch by mixing Franzin Whit Zin out of the box in the cabn with Sprite for an exotic kiddle cooler.
When coming back from port after buying booze, walk confidently past the security desk where all the goodie-goodies stop and turn in their booze which they will never see again till the last night of the cruise. Again, the waterbottle trick works well here and adds some excitement to the port call. I remember hiding in a bathroom pouring Captain Morgan into an Evian bottle with DD more than I remember what port that even was.
I like that idea of FedXing your booze to the first port of call then bringing it back on in your beach bag. Seems kinda pricey though.

Common Smuggling Questions

If we buy some liquor in the ports to take home with us and put it in our beach bag, will the cruise line confiscate it until the end of the trip? Is there any way to get around this short of putting the liquor into a water bottle?

We used to sneak into a bathroom at whatever port we were in and pour it into water bottles but finally just put it in a beach bag then asked the first security guard we came to where we turn it in. He'll point behind him, past the other 6 people in front of you, past the xray machine and past the metal detector. Pick it up and just keep walking, with other members of your party surrounding you.

If they "caught" me I would say "OH, THAT table?" and turn it in.

It's silly to have to play these games but its stupid to buy the stuff then not use it.

Last few cruises we've not bought anything and consumed the little we actually do drink onboard, bought from bars. I just don't like feeling like a crook but that's what you've got to do to get it on.

www.easytravelerinc.com

Pack your booze the easy way with these new products!

(Tell the truth: What did you think this was a photo of when you first saw it?)

Cruise Line Alcohol Policies

Check with your cruise line- these policies were accurate at the time we added them here

Azamara Cruises	Drinking Age	BYOB at Embarkation	In Port Purchases	Corkage Fee
	21 for all North American Cruises, For European and South American sailings, parents may sign a waiver when traveling with their sons or daughters 18-21 allowing them to consume alcohol.	2 bottles of wine per state room	All alcohol purchased either on board in duty free shop or in port will be held for passengers until disembarkation.	$25 for wine opened in dining room or specialty restaurant
	Enforcement Policy Reserves the right to search luggage for any kind of container such as mouthwash or water bottles for alcohol. Alcohol will be disposed of and no compensation given to passengers. They also reserve the right to deny boarding or disembark passengers for alcohol violations.
	Online Chatter about Policy Not much chatter as this is a brand new cruise line. Azamara?fs site states they will follow the same policies as Celebrity
Carnival Cruise Line	Drinking Age	BYOB at Embarkation	In Port Purchases	Corkage Fee
	21 or older	One bottle of wine or champagne per person	All alcohol purchased either on board in duty free shop or in port will be held for passengers until disembarkation.	$10 in Dining room, $14 in Supper club
	Enforcement Policy Any alcohol (other than wine) hidden in luggage or in carry-ons will be confiscated, disposed of, and passengers will receive no compensation. They also have a ban on bringing excessive amounts of Non-Alcoholic drinks such as water, juice and soda.
	Online Chatter about Policy Enforcements seems uneven. Some passengers report luggage being x-rayed and when contraband was found they had to open the luggage and the item was confiscated. Others report stashing a plastic bottle of liquor or a bottle in bubble wrap that was not confiscated. Some report their electric iron being confiscated but not their alcohol.
Celebrity Cruises	Drinking Age	BYOB at Embarkation	In Port Purchases	Corkage Fee
	21 for all North American Cruises, For European and South American sailings, parents may sign a waiver when traveling with their sons or daughters 18-21 allowing them to consume alcohol. 21 for all North American Cruises.	2 bottles of wine per state room	All alcohol purchased either on board in duty free shop or in port will be held for passengers until disembarkation.	$25 for wine opened in dining room or specialty restaurant
	Enforcement Policy Reserves the right to search luggage for any kind of container such as mouthwash or water bottles for alcohol. Alcohol will be disposed of and no compensation given to passengers. They also reserve the right to deny boarding or disembark passengers for alcohol violations.
	Online Chatter about Policy Actual enforcement seems some what uneven and may vary with itinerary, ship, or staff. For example, some passengers on a Pacific Northwest wine cruise reported purchasing wine ashore and consuming in dining room with corkage fee, others passengers on different cruises report wine or other alcohol being confiscated and held till disembarkation.
Costa Cruises	Drinking Age	BYOB at Embarkation	In Port Purchases	Corkage Fee
	21 years or older for all cruises departing from the US, 18 for any cruise departing from other ports.	Costa website says no food or drink may be brought aboard, but some cruisers report bringing wine with prior authorization.	All alcohol purchased either in on board duty free shop or in port will be held for passengers until disembarkation	$10 per bottle for previously authorized wine.
	Enforcement Policy All bags are x-rayed and liquor is confiscated until disembarkation.
	Online Chatter about Policy Enforcement seems be very uneven. Reports vary from ?gI just hid it in by beach bag wrapped in a towel and nothing was said?h to ?gSecurity showed it to me right on the x-ray and it was so obvious. The kept it for me till the end of the cruise.?h Others say they just hid it in their checked luggage and it was not a problem.
Crystal Cruises	Drinking Age	BYOB at Embarkation	In Port Purchases	Corkage Fee
	21or older for liquor, However depending on the departure location or itinerary, 18 -21 year olds may be permitted to consume beer or wine, while in US waters guest must be 21.	Yes, for in state room consumption only. Wine may be brought to the dining rooms with a corkage fee.	Alcohol purchased in ports or in t he duty free shop may be consumed in State Rooms	$15 for wine opened in dining room or specialty restaurants
	Enforcement Policy None
	Online Chatter about Policy Most passengers feel that Crystals lenient BYOB policy is because they are an expensive luxury cruise line. Because the initial price is so expensive they don?ft have to ?gmake-up?h the difference of a lower price through alcohol sales.
Cunard Line	Drinking Age	BYOB at Embarkation	In Port Purchases	Corkage Fee
	18 years or older in Britain or International Waters, 21 while in US ports or waters.	One bottle of wine or champagne per person over 18	All alcohol purchased either on board in duty free shop or in port will be held for passengers until disembarkation.	$10 for wine consumed in dining room
	Enforcement Policy Will confiscate hold liquor bottles until disembarkation.
	Online Chatter about Policy Many passengers report successfully smuggling both extra bottles of wine and liquor, while others have had it confiscated.
Disney Cruises	Drinking Age	BYOB at Embarkation	In Port Purchases	Corkage Fee
	21 years or older for all cruises	Yes, for in state room consumption only. Wine may be brought to the dining rooms with a corkage fee.	Alcohol purchased in ports may be consumed in State Rooms, items purchased in the duty free shop will be held until disembarkation	$15
	Enforcement Policy Coolers are no longer permitted, and alcohol carried on board must be in a carry-on and may not exceed 22?? wide, 14?? high and 9?? deep.
	Online Chatter about Policy Disney now publishes their alcohol policy on their website, and it is one of the most lenient in the industry. Online chatter at the cruise boards confirms this.
Holland America	Drinking Age	BYOB at Embarkation	In Port Purchases	Corkage Fee
	21 years or older for all cruises	Wine and Champagne, no specified limits	All alcohol purchased either on board in duty free shop or in port will be held for passengers until disembarkation, except for wine and champagne	$15 for wine consumed in dining room.
	Enforcement Policy Will confiscate hold liquor bottles until disembarkation.
	Online Chatter about Policy Enforcement seems uneven. Some passengers report that not only were they permitted to bring onboard their wines and champagne, but also an occasional liquor bottle.
Hurtigruten (Norwegian Coastal Voyage)	Drinking Age	BYOB at Embarkation	In Port Purchases	Corkage Fee
	Not specified	Yes, for in state room consumption only.	Allowed for in room consumption	Not Permitted
	Enforcement Policy None, other than it must be consumed in room
	Online Chatter about Policy Not much chatter.
Oceania Cruises	Drinking Age	BYOB at Embarkation	In Port Purchases	Corkage Fee
	18 for all destinations 18 for all destinations	Yes, beer and liquor for in room consumption only. Wine and champagne may be brought to restaurants for corkage fee	Allowed for in room consumption	$20
	Enforcement Policy None, other than beer and liquor must be consumed in room
	Online Chatter about Policy Lots of happy passengers report no hassles and even getting tips from security on where to get great wines in port.
MSC Cruises	Drinking Age	BYOB at Embarkation	In Port Purchases	Corkage Fee
	21 years or older	None	All alcohol purchased either on board in duty free shop or in port will be held for passengers until disembarkation.	Not Permitted
	Enforcement Policy In order to ensure our health and security standards, starting November 1^st 2008, it will be strictly forbidden to bring food and beverage onboard the vessels of our fleet.In compliance with this regulation and in order to guarantee the above standards, during embarkation a careful check control will be carried out through all passengers luggage.
	Online Chatter about Policy Online chatter states that enforcement is uneven. Some passengers packed liquor or wine in check bags upon embarkation, some just brought it onboard from ports in not so obvious bags. Consistently there seems to be no corkage policy, so even wine must be consumed in cabin and not in the dining room. However one passenger even reported that their waiter did uncork the bottle they brought in the dining room. Another reported knowing someone who brought aboard 30 bottles of wine.
NCL	Drinking Age	BYOB at Embarkation	In Port Purchases	Corkage Fee
	Alaska and Hawaii, minimum age is 21, on other destination, parents of 18 to 20 year olds may sign a waiver allowing their son or daughter to consume wine and beer. All cruises 21 years old is minimum for liquor	Wine and champagne only if they are not on the NCL wine list, Corkage fee is applied to all bottle brought on board, not just those consumed in the dining rooms.	Wine and Champagne purchased in port can be brought on board for consumption in dining rooms and $15 corkage fee is applied, liquor purchases held until disembarkation	$15, applied at the time wine is brought onboard
	Enforcement Policy Luggage and packages searched. Liquor confiscated and held, Corkage fee applied to all wine.
	Online Chatter about Policy Actual enforcement seems some what uneven and may vary with itinerary, ship, or staff. Some passengers report packing wine and liquor in their suit case, delivered to their room and nothing ever being said. Others with two bottles of wine had to pay corkage upon embarkation when it was discovered in packed luggage.
Princess Cruises	Drinking Age	BYOB at Embarkation	In Port Purchases	Corkage Fee
	21 on all ships except Sea Princess, where it is 18 due to largely British passengers	None	Wine and Champagne can be brought on board for consumption during port visits, liquor will be held until disembarkation	$15 in dining room
	Enforcement Policy No enforcement measures mentioned by Princess, other than security to help you store your shore purchases until the end of the cruise
	Online Chatter about Policy Passengers report bringing liquor and wine aboard during embarkation and port visits
Regent Seven Seas	Drinking Age	BYOB at Embarkation	In Port Purchases	Corkage Fee
	21 all cruises	Allowed, but why bother, Regent included a 2 bottle bar set up in room and complementary wine with some meals	Allowed for in room consumption	$10
	Enforcement Policy None, other than it must be consumed in room
	Online Chatter about Policy Regent has an inclusive alcohol policy so it is rare that passengers bring their own wine or liquor on board.
Royal Caribbean International	Drinking Age	BYOB at Embarkation	In Port Purchases	Corkage Fee
	21 for all North American Cruises, For European and South American sailings, parents may sign a waiver when traveling with their sons or daughters 18-21 allowing them to consume alcohol.	None	All alcohol purchased either on board in duty free shop or in port will be held for passengers until disembarkation.	Not Permitted
	Enforcement Policy Reserves the right to search luggage for any kind of container such as mouthwash or water bottles for alcohol. Alcohol will be disposed of and no compensation given to passengers. RC also prohibits passengers from bringing any non-alcoholic beverages onboard, unless medically required with doctors note. They also reserve the right to deny boarding or disembark passengers for alcohol violations.
	Online Chatter about Policy Online Chatter seems to be all over the board for this one. Some passengers report that if you try to smuggle you have to go to the pursers office and open you luggage and turn over liquor to security. Others report stashing it in luggage and it arriving with no problems. Many say that they just put it in a less obvious container in order to smuggle it on. Some report security letting liquor go on with a wink and a smile while others report their water bottles being opened and sniffed for alcohol. Even the rule on non-alcoholic beverages seems to be unevenly enforced.